Bastion Ridley

has been a member since May 2007 and goes by bxridley.

The details of my life are quite inconsequential… Very well, where do I begin? My father was a tap-dancing defenestrator who suffered from Maple Syrup disease and had a penchant for bathing in Pepto-Bismol. He would make outrageous claims that he was a Bridget Fonda Impersonator, off to infiltrate the Tet Offensive. Sometimes he would accuse women of tripping and falling onto his penis. The general sort of lunacy his children question and lawyers find grounds for alimony.

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