Dear Me: Day 64

Uploaded 20 Feb 2011
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© Sarah Philipson
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Photo license: © All rights reserved

Day 64/365

I saw this on a card years ago and wrote it down because I thought it was excellent advice. It's probably advice I should have listened to earlier in the day.

All I wanted to do was relax. Maybe edit some photos, work on the little print album for the project, watch a few movies.. maybe even take a nap. And while that was going on, I wanted to wash my bedding. Pillows, quilts, fitted sheet, pillowcases... you know... the basics.

So I threw them in the washer and that's pretty much where it all went bad. I spent the rest of the day frustrated, kicking machines, throwing away sopping wet pillows and then finally celebrating when my godmother returned home, jiggled the drum, and got the washer working as though nothing had happened. :headdesk:

And after everything was running again, we went and had dinner, ran to Target (to buy new pillows to replace the ones I had to throw out), and as we got out of the car at Target I stopped. I opened my hands and faced my palms forward, feeling the breeze push against my closed eyes, smelling the air and feeling the sun setting behind us.

And it was such a wonderful moment. A 30-second span of time when I rooted myself to the world around me. I forgot my frustration, I forgot my exhaustion, I forgot the things I hadn't gotten done. I just-- breathed.

I need to do that more often. Root myself to the wind, to the earth, to the sky, the clouds, the sunset. I don't really consider myself a "nature girl" but maybe I should re-evaluate that. After my snow-hike a couple weeks ago, I felt so ... fulfilled. So, now that the days are getting longer, we're hiring new people (and maybe I can switch schedules), I'm going to try and start getting out after work... if not out to the lake then just around the neighborhood maybe. Some music, some nature... my camera.

I need that. I need to reconnect with that part of myself. Teach myself how to breathe again.

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